Why Do I Keep Ending Up Here Again?
April 26, 2019
Addictions, relationships that don’t seem to work, unexplained fears, constant feelings of being different or just not belonging anywhere in this world; these are some of the many things that can stem from childhood trauma or from growing up in a less than functional family. As adults, we sometimes fear that we are stuck with the baggage we ended up carrying from our childhoods. Patterns that we inherited from our families can be so strong that we feel we are doomed to keep playing those patterns out in our adult lives. This is not true.
Childhood is a time of immense learning. If we are lucky, we learn useful skills to succeed in managing our lives and handling our emotions. But not everyone is that lucky. And whether or not we learn skills that will help us navigate our world, we still learn plenty of things that hinder our lives more than help. What we learn as children, whether taught to us directly or whether we just picked it up in spite of our parents’ best efforts to avoid passing down their less desirable traits, can impact us long into adulthood. Sometimes we minimize the impact and other times don’t even recognize the long-term impact of childhood issues at all. What we learn in childhood has a long-lasting and profound impact on us.
We can also adapt behavior in childhood that “works” for us at that time. Maybe we learned to eat to alleviate feelings of emotional emptiness or to masturbate as a way to self-sooth. Maybe we learned to rage as the only way for us to feel some element of power and control, to stay busy with overworking to avoid feelings, or to look very good on the outside to make up for how awful we felt on the inside, etc, etc, etc. Whatever childhood behavior that “worked” for us as a child, we may find to be destructive to ourselves and in our relationships as adults. We need to find healthy coping skills to manage our emotions and our lives as we mature into adulthood.
No matter how we may find ourselves playing out the less than ideal lessons from our childhood, it often requires help to break those patterns. Rio Retreat Center at The Meadows has a workshop designed to offer that help. Survivors Workshop focuses explicitly on issues that individuals inherit from the family of origin and on the residual impact of childhood trauma. Survivors workshop therapists are highly trained and skilled in unearthing the roots of issues that stem from childhood. They use creative skills and time-honored therapeutic approaches to assist participants in letting go of carried emotions and behaviors from childhood. Participants are empowered to break free from obstacles that have held them back and to choose and use new healthy coping mechanisms that promote living a life of authentic fulfillment.
For more information on the Survivors Workshop, please click here or call our Intake Department at 1-800-244-4949 to speak with an Intake Coordinator.